My Bells Palsy journey, Day 2

Good morning world!!  Tuesday, 4am and I look in the mirror and smile a big ole "crooked" smile.  Yep, it did not go away.  It was not just a bad dream.  I was hoping that all symptoms would be gone when I woke up.  Yes I think I was hoping to be that overnight miracle.   So reality began to set in.  I took my new pills, sent Tom off to work and went back to bed.  I slept better than I had in a week.  My earache though still there was tolerable.  I was feeling a little groggy, probably from the meds. 

So this morning is the second day after the facial paralysis happened.  I have to eat a snack before I can take my pills and that is fun, trying to chew, keep my mouth closed is going to be a learning experience.  It is probably not pretty.  My right eye is still wide open and is now taking turns between being so wet that it makes my vision blurry to being so dry.  Time to take my meds and that is fun as water trickles down the side of my mouth.   It is harder to negotiate than it was yesterday, but I am still slurping, ugggg.   Maybe try a straw later.  

I call my mom to give her an update.  I texted with a couple of friends.  I checked out facebook.  I'm working on an ebook I am writing but I can not concentrate on any thing long.  Today I discover my attention span is shot.  And when I need to switch what I'm doing I just have to change what I'm doing.   So that is very frustrating.  Oh and noises are bothering me.   Through out the day my eye has twitching sessions, and it is weird because the tears that have welled up move around like little swishing waves, oh but when the eyebrow decides to twitch that is an experience.  Lunch is not fun things still taste strange.  I have to concentrate to keep the food in my mouth and take much smaller bites.   Still haven't mastered drinking either and find that it is hard to drink hot coffee out of a mug, the thickness of the rim makes it hard and coffee dribbles down the edge of the cup when I have taken a sip.   That is frustrating.  I'm a mess lol...


So at the end of day 2, all the symptoms are still here.   It is real.  There are things I will be relearning.  I know that I really don't want to go out in public, especially where it is an eating thing.  I know that I'm very close to a big cry but it hasn't happened yet!!

I am still so grateful that it is only this Bells Palsy.   I am grateful that it is just my face that has paralysis.   I am beyond grateful that I have Tom as my husband, life partner and at this time my nurse... I am grateful for my friends that are praying for me...  God is good... 

So speaking of God,  I am curious what he is doing with this...   I know that in other times in my life he has used situations to prepare me for something or someone that will come later in my life... 

Its just Bells Pasly, it is temporary, it is part of my journey!!!
and remember, find something to celebrate everyday!!!  I will!!!

Bell's Palsy? or what? Day 1

For a week I had an earache.  It was not constant but it was painful off and on.  This earache was painful enough that it caused me to not be able to sleep.  On Friday things tasted funny.  It was like there was a coating on everything I ate and it tasted metallic.  This taste and the earache continued thru the weekend.  On Sunday night my mouth felt a little strange and numb.  But I thought it was lingering effects from some ambesol that I had used thinking the earache might be from a tooth I had some trouble with.  Also my right eye started watering on Saturday constantly but I just thought it was because of allergies, although it is usually my left eye that waters constant.  It was also way more water than usual,  I can now say.    

So Monday morning I woke up and got Tom sent off to work as usual.   I was tired so went back to sleep.  When I woke up at 9,  I took a bath and got dressed.  I needed to go to the store to get some things for a party I was going to for lunch.  I put my hair up in a bun and went to the store.  It was time to get myself ready to go to the party when I went into the bathroom to fix my hair and makeup.  That was when I noticed my dropping face.  When I smiled my right side stayed the same while the left side made a full smile.   I was crooked.  My right eye was wide open.   Even my neck looked different on the right side.  I was suddenly so scared. 

I lifted up my arms to see if they felt like they were tingling, or numb.  I was suddenly conscious of every part of my body and checking to see if I was ok.  I found on the back of my head one of the lymph nodes was swollen and hurt to touch but other than that nothing different then usual.

I went to the kitchen and put the items I was going to take to the party in the freezer and went across the street to let Vicki know I wouldn't be able to come, I needed to go to the doctor or the dentist and find out what was wrong.

Because I had also had this tooth thing going on I wasn't sure if I should go to the doctor or the dentist but decided be cause my mouth looked like when my brother had his stroke I would call the doctor first.  I went and took this picture so I would have it in case someone needed it.  This is no exaggeration no filter.

Now anxiety steps in.  I have not gone to the doctor often at all and I wasn't even sure which number to call.   But I found it in my phone and called and I choose to talk to a nurse.  I told her my symptoms, crooked smile, numb face, earache, watery eye, metal taste in my mouth, and swollen lymph node.   She put me through some tests in front of the mirror.  I was shocked when she told me to close the effected eye and I couldn't.  It didn't blink all the way when the other eye did.  I could still see light and shadows when my eyes were supposedly closed.  I had not tingling or numbness in my extremities, I was walking fine, no leaning to one side or the other.  My balance was fine.  She also had me check other things all okay.   So then she told me it sounded like Bell's Palsy and that though I didn't need an ambulance or emergency room I should be seen today and transferred me back to make an appointment.   I got an appointment for 7:10pm the earliest I could see a doctor.  And now the waiting started.  Oh somewhere in there I had messaged my husband.
Tick Tock Tick Tock
 I called my mom and my daughter.
Tick Tock Tick Tock
I cut out some starfish.
Tom messaged me that he would be taking me to the doctor.
Tick tockticktock
I did make a scrapbook page.

Tom came home and told me what he had learned about Bells Palsy.  I had not yet been brave enough to go look it up.   I was shocked to find that all my symptoms even the taste were symptoms of Bells Palsy.  The fact that it said in most cases it was only temporary made me feel better.  But for me looking back I think the thing that kept me most calm was that it was not a stroke. 

Time continued to tick along and it was finally time to go to the doctor.  We got in the car and started our half hour journey to town.   I pulled down the visor as we were going into the sun and wanted to shade my very sensitive eyes and looked in the mirror and made some faces.  Yep still crooked.  Then I took this picture of me trying to make a fish kiss face. 

yep still crooked.  No exaggeration.  I'm still calm and have not told anyone outside of family and a few friends.   So I start writing a post for facebook as I am getting a little scared.  The post has this picture and then this picture of  a sign from the doctors office that just seemed ironic yet comforting.

So now after that horrific blood pressure machine that hurts so bad and releases so slow ugggg.   And being weighed uggg.   I finally get a room and Tom joins me and we wait for the Doctor.  

The doctor comes in and asks me what I am there for.   So I smile.  Then I tell him my symptoms.  First he thanks me for calling the nurse and not rushing into the er.   Then asks me what I think I have.   I tell him Bells Palsy.   He said it sounded like it and told me about it.  Most was what I had read when I googled it.  Then we talked about treatment.   He suggested a med for viral infection and a steroid.  He said they may help they may not.  I was mostly hoping they would help the earache at that point as it had kept me from sleeping. 

So I have a diagnosis.  Bells Palsy.  I got my meds spoke to the pharmacist and we go home.  On the way home I posted the diagnosis with a little info on facebook.   I don't want to tell the story over and over again and this really is a great way for me to just get it out there.  Tom heated up some pizza Vicki had brought us that was from the party I missed.  I was drinking my water when I realized I was slurping.  So that was new.  Uggg.  Went to bed and slept so good for the first time in a week.